If you've watched Adolescence on Netflix, or caught Louis Theroux's recent documentary Inside the Manosphere, you've likely had the same conversation the rest of Australia has been having: how did we get here? And more importantly, what do we do about it?

These productions have done something valuable. They've pulled a deeply uncomfortable reality out of the shadows of online forums and into living rooms, dinner tables, and school staffrooms. They've made visible something that many parents, educators, and community workers have been quietly alarmed about for years.

But here's what those documentaries don't show you: what happens after. What happens when a young man finds his way out. What it looks like when communities invest early, when boys are given language for their emotions before an algorithm gives it to them, and when men are shown that real strength includes empathy, accountability, and connection.

That's the story we want to tell.

What Is the Manosphere, and Why Does It Matter Here?

The manosphere is not a fringe phenomenon. According to the Movember Foundation, two-thirds of young men regularly engage with masculinity influencers online. These communities span fitness forums, dating advice channels, podcast networks, and gaming spaces. On the surface, they appear to offer what many young men are genuinely searching for: community, direction, and a sense of identity.

"What makes the manosphere so appealing is it promises a formula for 'guaranteed' success: physically, sexually and financially. This is a very potent and alluring promise, especially when someone is dealing with the ordinary turbulence and insecurities of adolescence." - Julie Inman Grant, eSafety Commissioner

But beneath the fitness tips and financial advice lies a current of misogyny and hostility that researchers are increasingly linking to real-world harm. A 2025 ANROWS report found that manosphere discourses are filtering through to boys in Australian schools, with students who engage with this content showing troubling views on relationships, including the normalisation of controlling and violent behaviour.

Australia's own security agency, ASIO, has flagged the links between incel ideology and the potential for lone-offender violence. Researchers at Monash University have documented growing rates of hostile sexism in Australian secondary schools. And according to UN Women, an international survey found that Gen Z audiences are the most exposed to sexist rhetoric online of any generation.

This is happening in our communities. In schools in the Southern Sydney region. It is not a problem that begins and ends on a screen.

Why Boys Are Vulnerable - and Why That's Not a Criticism

Understanding the manosphere's appeal is not the same as excusing it. It's essential to countering it.

Research from Equimundo's State of American Men report found that two-thirds of young men feel that 'no one really knows me.' Boys and young men frequently encounter manosphere content while searching for entirely normal things: fitness tips, dating advice, how to handle social anxiety. The algorithm does the rest.

Gender stereotypes play a powerful role here. When boys aren't given safe spaces to speak openly about their emotions, anxieties, or vulnerabilities, they seek those spaces elsewhere. Movember's research found that young men who actively engage with masculinity influencers are more likely to report higher levels of worthlessness and nervousness, less likely to prioritise their mental health, and more likely to place outsized value on wealth and social status.

The manosphere does not create broken boys. It finds them at a moment of uncertainty and offers them a ready-made explanation for their pain, one that conveniently places the blame elsewhere. That is precisely why early, real-world connection matters so much.

"These influencers thrive on notoriety and clicks... We need to support boys to spot exploitative patterns, while also educating them how algorithms and recommender systems are usually designed to promote controversy and outrage." - eSafety Commissioner

 

The Good News: Boys Can and Do Find Their Way Out

One of the most important things the current public conversation is missing is hope.

A recent Australian Institute of Criminology study drew on interviews with men who had left incel and manosphere communities. The findings are significant: most men first encountered these communities during periods of insecurity, loneliness, or social isolation. And many left when they found something more compelling in real life - genuine relationships, mentorship, a sense of belonging that didn't require putting anyone else down.

This matters for how we respond. As researchers from Monash University argue, treating radicalisation as inevitable and disengagement as impossible would be a profound mistake. The road map for helping boys and young men find their way through exists. It is built on connection, trust, and real-world role models.

It is also built on men who are willing to stand up and be counted.

Men as Allies: What It Actually Looks Like

There is a particular power in men challenging harmful ideas about masculinity. Not because women's voices don't matter, but because the manosphere speaks almost exclusively to men. Counter-narratives need to come from inside that conversation.

Allyship isn't about perfection. It starts with listening. Listening to the experiences of women and girls in your life. Listening to young men who are struggling. Noticing when the language around you shifts, when a joke crosses a line, when silence becomes complicity.

It looks like a father who talks openly about his emotions with his son. A coach who names respect as part of his team's culture. A workplace leader who ensures that domestic violence training is part of his company's onboarding. A friend who says, simply, 'That's not okay.'

These moments don't make headlines. But they are the architecture of cultural change. And they happen, every day, in our community.

Where The Family Co. Fits In

For more than 38 years, The Family Co. has been doing this work long before it had a name in a Netflix documentary. We exist because we believe every child and family deserves a safe home, strong connections, and the opportunity to thrive.

Our Toolbox Talks program brings domestic violence prevention and awareness training directly into Australian workplaces, equipping men and women with the knowledge and language to recognise, name, and challenge the attitudes that allow violence to persist. Because DFV prevention doesn't begin when someone is in crisis. It begins in the ordinary, everyday moments where culture is shaped.

Through our Child, Youth and Family services, we work with young people navigating exactly the pressures and vulnerabilities that make them susceptible to harmful online content. We offer connection, consistency, and safe adults who show up, week after week, as real-world evidence that relationships can be built on respect rather than control.

 

"What I see at The Family Co. gives me a lot of hope. When you sit with a young person and open up a conversation about relationships, respect, and what it actually means to be a good man, something shifts. They're not disengaged. They just haven't always had someone offer it to them in a way that feels real.

That's what our respectful relationships based programs for primary school students are about. Not lecturing young people, but meeting them where they are and giving them something the algorithm never will: a genuine human conversation about what healthy connection looks like.

When I spoke on the panel at The Family Co.’s Men for Change breakfast last December, I was struck by how many men in that room wanted to be part of the solution. They just needed a place to start. That's what The Family Co. tries to be, for young people in schools and for the men in our community. A place to start."

- James, Child, Youth and Family Team Leader, The Family Co.

James was a panellists at The Family Co.’s inaugural Men for Change breakfast in December 2025, held as part of the global 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence. Hosted in partnership with Quest Woolooware Bay, the event brought together community leaders, educators, and male allies to explore the practical steps men can take in education, advocacy, and modelling respectful behaviour.

The panel included Dino Mezzatesta, Group CEO of the Cronulla Sharks, school principal Peter Buxton of De La Salle Catholic College Caringbah, and NSW MP Mark Speakman. Sutherland Shire Mayor Jack Boyd opened the event, with Hughes MP David Moncrieff and Cook MP Simon Kennedy also in attendance - a reflection of the cross-community commitment this issue deserves.

“Male voices are vital in shaping a culture where violence is never tolerated and equality thrives. Every man can be part of the solution - and education and allyship are key enablers of change.” - Ashleigh Daines, CEO, The Family Co.

The conversation in that room was honest, practical, and hopeful and is exactly the kind the manosphere cannot offer. It wasn’t about blame. It was about responsibility. And it drew men from across the community who were ready to take it seriously.

The Family Co. receives an average of 400 local referrals per month for domestic and family violence support, and assists over 16,000 people across Southern Sydney each year. Men for Change is our commitment to ensuring that number goes down - not because the need disappears, but because the culture begins to change.

Why Discretionary Funding Changes Everything

Much of what The Family Co. does is funded through government contracts tied to specific service areas and client groups. That funding is vital and we're deeply grateful for it. But it is also, by its nature, limited in scope.

Discretionary funding, the kind that comes from individual donors, workplace giving programs, and community supporters, is what allows us to reach the people who fall between the lines. The young man who doesn't quite meet the criteria for a statutory referral but is clearly struggling. The parent who needs support before a situation becomes a crisis. The school that wants to run a session on respectful relationships but doesn't have a budget line for it.

It is what allows us to do prevention work, not just response work. And prevention, as anyone who works in this space knows, is where the biggest impact lives.

When you donate to The Family Co., you are not funding a program. You are funding a conversation that happens at the right moment, with the right person, before the algorithm gets there first.

From Surviving to Thriving, Together

The manosphere is a symptom of something real: young men who are lonely, searching for identity, and not finding what they need in the spaces around them. That is not a problem unique to the internet. It is a community challenge. And it has a community response.

We cannot outsource the raising of our boys to content creators who profit from their insecurity. We need families, schools, workplaces, and community organisations to show up, consistently and warmly, with something better on offer.

The Family Co. is that something better. And we need your support to keep showing up.

 

Get Involved

Whether you're an individual, a business, or a workplace leader, there are ways to be part of this work.

Donate to our discretionary fund: https://thefamilyco.supporterhub.net.au/donations/survivingtothriving

Bring training to your workplace: contact our Partnerships team at [email protected]

Learn more about our services: thefamilyco.org.au | (02) 9528 2933